The Secret Languages of Connection

How understanding communication styles can help you relate authentically with anyone

Why, despite all our best efforts, do we fail to “just get along”?

The answers to this question can be seen in our questions, stories, comments, and silence. They can be seen in how we expect others to initiate or to respond, how much focus we put on ourselves versus on others, how we change in situations of stress versus safety.
They are different languages and dialects of communication, as complex and as comprehensible as any other tongue.
They are the Relating Languages – the key to understanding anyone, to finding “our tribe”,and to deciphering the secret language of all human beings.

Why is it that I become friends with some people at first contact, but with others, we struggle for years to work together? Why do I get along with my partner, but not my partner’s friends or family? Why do I always fight with my parents?

These questions all point to the same difficulty: translating between our different backgrounds, worldviews, and expectations. Communication often seems like a mysterious land to which we travel, blind, and feel our way among the objects and obstacles to moments of shared understanding. Even those of us who say we are teachers stand with our flag on this or that island called NVC, AR, NLP or some other acronym, calling, “I’ve found it!” across the vast unknown ocean called human connection.

In this workshop, we will explore a revolutionary new meta-framework for demystifying interpersonal connection. It’s called “The Relating Languages”.

This framework explains how each of us uniquely tend to connect. It can tell us which connection languages are native or foreign to us, and how that helps or hinders us in relationship to others in our lives. It explains why we find our boss abrasive, our siblings withholding, our co-workers intrusive, or our parents long-winded. It gives us a roadmap to better connection, anywhere we are.

“I discovered how important authentic human connection was to my soul. People I had just met provided profound reflections that revealed blind spots I had buried long ago. And I felt so energized by each day I had trouble sleeping at night.”
Nevin McConnell Engineer @ Apple

Learn about the Relating Languages

In this course, we will learn about: 

The Questioners, who relate by getting curious about others’ realities. How do you welcome their curiosity while setting boundaries around what you want to share?

The Observers, who quietly watch and pay attention until something needs to be said. How do you match their calm pace of interaction while also getting to know them and hear what they have to say?

The Storytellers, who share experiences and information. How do you engage with the pictures they paint about themselves and the world, without being overwhelmed by words?

The Challengers, who make jokes and stimulate debate. How do you meet their level of intensity without taking their barbs and jokes personally?



After this workshop, you’ll walk away with a better understanding of:

  • Your primary Relating Languages in stress, social, and safety situations
  • What Relating Languages you struggle to connect with most
  • What each Language is motivated by
  • How to relate better with any Language
  • Who in your life you’d like to get closer to, and how you can do it using this system

The workshop will take place:
Friday 3 June 18:00 – 21:00
Saturday 4 June 10:00 – 19:00
Sunday 5 June 10:00 – 17:00

Price: 2300 dkk (including 25% Danish VAT)

Leaders: Sara Ness (Authentic Revolution)
Daniel Brooks (ART International)

Cancellation terms:

Please note that we do not offer refunds. However you can transfer your ticket to another person.
Let us know via email in case someone else will take your spot.

More Information
To receive more information, please write to


Sara Ness

Sara Ness is the Founder and Chief Instigator of Authentic Revolution. She began teaching Authentic Relating in 2012, founding a thousands-strong learning community in Austin, Texas and going on to train over 350 leaders and help found 30+ other communities worldwide. Sara is passionate about exposing the joy of human connection and exploring our creative potential through relationship. She has facilitated at schools, companies, yoga studios, a funeral, Burning Man, and more, bringing playful social technology into the mainstream and the non-mainstream. Sara is into suggesting ideas like push up contests in fancy restaurants and convincing other people to do them too. Hence, community leadership.

Sara works most of the time. When not doing that, she’s into acroyoga, Ecstatic Dance, cooking, and spending time with the many people she loves. She’s most lit up by creating things – projects, books, movements, systems, anything that her heart and brain can chew on at the same time.

Daniel Brooks

Brooks considers himself a nerd at heart. Over the years, having originally been trained as a physicist, a soldier, and a zen monk, he now devotes his full nerdiness to the topic of human connection. In 2010 he discovered authentic relating and was immediately hooked on the vast potential of it, and has since made it an integral part of his personal and professional practice. He is engaged in community leadership with the Borderland, travels around the EU teaching authentic relating, lives in Copenhagen, and dislikes talking about himself in third person.

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